The Longing Mother

Today begins an eight part look at mothers, who they are and how we can minister to them.

 

The first mother is the Longing Mother.

 

This is the woman for reasons beyond her control has not know the joy and fulfillment of being a mother.

 

Most women start planning and anticipating motherhood while they are still little girls. We have our baby dolls that we tenderly wash, dress, and carry with us. Sometimes we dress up kittens and puppies, pretending they are our babies. This nurturing is born in us and we long to lavish it on our own wee one.

 

For the longing mother....Sometimes....the longing never ceases. I, along with several members of my family, suffered with infertility. 

 

Mine was rectified, but often it is not. 

 

Some women never marry. 

 

Some suffer from miscarriage of that precious child.

 

How can we minister to these dear longing hearts?

 

First....understand and be sensitive to the longings of their hearts. 

 

I can not tell you how hard it was for me on Mothers Day when all the mothers would stand up to be honored in church. Mother’s Day, 1977, I was the ONLY woman not standing in my church choir.

 

Be sensitive about asking questions like...

 

Are you two EVER going to start a family?

 

You know your mother is just dying to be a grandmother!

 

When are you going to have a baby...you are not getting any younger!

 

I suffered a miscarriage between my first and second daughter. Please understand that the child I lost is just as real to me as the ones I held. I may have smiled and nodded in agreement when I was told that “God knew best...maybe something was wrong with the baby...God will give you another child” ...But let me tell you. Those words cut me like a knife. There was no balm or comfort even though I know the ones saying it to me wanted no more than my comfort.

 

Offer words of love and consolation. Let the parents know that you are aware of their loss and that their child was precious and real. It is okay to say you are sorry.

 

Allow them to talk about their loss. Love them and let the love of God be manifested through you to comfort them.

 

Lastly, pray for direction from the Holy Spirit. 

 

Don’t assume that because a woman does not have children that she will want to work in the nursery. That may be too painful. But...it may also be just the thing that she needs to soothe her longings.

 

Pray for....be attentive to....and most of all..love the Longing Mother.